MaRuViN's

today... i make the biggest fake smile face in my 18 year life time...
what an amazing actor i am there... pretending there is nothing happen.. and pretending that my heart is always that good... that actually i can't even put how hurt it is in to words...

i don't know how to act... it's just silly, in these several years, i keep on smiling in front of everyone... let every people see my fake smiling face..
they don't even trust that i'm not in the mood, when i told them...
i don't know is that really that i wan't...

i just don't know... what i know in less than 3 days time, i'll back to my track, building my future... n consider to fight harder than i should... i dunno whether i need to fight for my "so called" love until that far...
i just too afraid to get hurt... but i know that's what a man should do... i need to learn everything...

so i think i'll try to fight this battle...